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Life


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Life is full with lies and uncertainties. Sometimes, I don't even know which one to believe, it's very confusing. I'm not just talking about my life but also events that happen around me. From Osama, Anwar scandal, economic crisis, disease, disaster and so on. These things baffle me, what is actually the true meaning of life if it is full with misery and hardship? Not to mention the manipulation created by men for their own good. 

It saddens me in the way that I could not described, why just can't we live peacefully. Why create problem that we don't even need? I truly understand some events are beyond human control, but there are many things we could change. But why people with power don't do anything as they are powerless. This baffles me too. 

I'm not planning to write long post for this one, I just want share with my readers about my frustration towards life and world. 

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Things that you should know about me


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It isn’t that important actually but I figure you guys might want to know a little bit about myself. Some of you might already know what type of person I am , but most of you don’t know me at all. So here’s the list that I’ve made, let’s check it out ya!


1. I have  low self-esteem.
Yes, people the Akmal Hakim @ Popo that you know is actually have lowwww self estem. This is probably surprised some people because due to my ‘strong’ and ‘confident’ exterior. Hey, don’t judge the book by it’s cover. I’m actually always feel insecure about everything. However, I don’t let my self confidence to ruin or affect my daily life. For me life has to be going no matter what, unless if you dead of course.

2.   I’m a pervert.
I think everybody already know about it, don’t need to explain.

3.   Once I like thing, I’m going to stick with it.
Yeah, I’m a loyal-type-of-person. When the moment I like song, food, place to hangout, I’m going to do the same thing everyday. It might sound boring to all of you, but I am very particular and consistent when it comes to something that I like. I don’t like to change thing that work well for me, I find it time consuming.

4.   I’m only can concerntrate about 5 minutes.
It’s hard for me to focus more than 5 minutes. No matter what I do, I will find another way to distract myself. This is the reason why I hate to go to cinema, I don’t like to watch entire movie without stopping or skipping some parts. Not only that it’s hard for me to receive and understand instruction, not because I’m stupid but it’s hard for me to focus when listening to people. I think I have Dyslexia... hmmm....

5. I have a romantic feeling.
It kinda embarrassing to tell you all about this, but since I was 7 years old, I have already had some romantic fantasy with girl. I’m not talking about the pervert one, but actually the ‘tangkap leleh’ and ‘jiwang karat’ versions. People only know about my pervert side, but they don’t know about this one. Finally, I reveal my dirty little secret.*Shy

Okay I think this list will give you some hint or clue about myself ( Actually I have more but I’m too lazy to type it). See you again and wish me luck for my final exam. Adios...

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Psychotic Mood Shift (PMS)


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These last couple days I feel like a woman having PMS, I have dramatic mood change for no reason. Sometimes, I feel happy then I feel sad, okay again and this condition goes on and on. I can’t explain why this is happening, if I know the answer for this question I will not be going to waste my time writing this nonsensical and rambling blog post. This is how I express myself, I don’t like to conceal my problem from others, I like to share my story and hardship. Frankly speaking I don’t give a damn, if nobody listen or care with what I am saying, what you have to do is to shut the fuck up and listen to me. Simple and easy.

Back to the feeling that I have these couple days, I feel that loneliness is probably the factor that contributes to this situation (I figured it out while writing this post). I am 22 years old this year, but I still don’t have a girlfriend. Guys at my age probably have already had 2-3 girlfriends from previous and current relationship. I do envy those guys. I hate when people write, ‘Single is better, couple is trouble’. I’m fucking hate it, deep from bottom of my heart.  Why you guys have to shatter my beautiful fantasy about love with that unnecessary quote? Can you all just shut the fuck up! That’s the most hypocrite quotation I have ever heard, I can guarrantee you, that those motherfuckers who said that word will not stay single for long after their break up but still they have the guts to say those word.

I may look like someone who doesn’t give a fuck about love and all those lovey-dovey stuffs, but actually I do. In fact, I think about it all the time. Don’t judge the book from its cover, deep inside this fat fuck’s mind (me) actually still have room for love. I’m just have to wait and see what life has to offer me. I don’t have any specific characteristics that I look for a girlfriend because I believe, no matter how well we plan for a thing, it has the probability to go wrong. Trust me, I know!

So, what I’m trying to say is, if there’s a girl out there like me just tell me, you can add my personal Facebook..... LOL :P

That’s a bit desperate.....
Okay, I don’t have anything to say, so hasta la vista and adios.
P/S: I notice that there are many visitors come from US and Europe, just want to say sorry for my bad English J

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PTPTN.....


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Last Friday is probably one of the best and the worst day in my life. Why did I say the best? Because I'm going to get loan money. For poor-ass like me, it means a lot to get the money, I am very happy to get my hand over it. Actually I have already made plan on how to spend it, I'm going to spend it 'wisely' as possible... I don't really concern how am I going to pay it back, let the future 'Akmal Hakim' taking care of it... Let future me, miserable.. Hahaha. (crazy talk!)

Now we're going to move to the worst part! The thing I hate the most in the world is waiting and that's how I spend my lovely Friday morning, with the hall full with motherfuckers who also desperate for money like me. I'd planned in advance to come to the hall about half hour early, it was about 8 a.m, I thought I was going to be the first person to arrive there. But I was wrong, BIG TIME. The hall was already full with people who were waiting since 6.30 a.m!! How crazy was that??? I had to line up to get into the hall and my waiting number was 1406!!! Yes, people this was the part that made me crazy, waiting for my turn.

To make thing worse, I had received message from my long time FB friend, whose-name-could-not-be-mentioned saying that she would take off to Bandung. While I was stucked waiting for my turn, she was going vacation. I'm envy you!! Huwarggghhhh....

Bring me along! I want to go vacation too!!

I waited from 8 a.m to 1 p.m for my turn. I was actually lucky compared to other people who had to wait from morning to 7 p.m! Actually, I had tried to bribe this girl who sat beside me to exchange her number (not phone number!!) with me. Her number was 1227. At first I offered her RM 10, but she rejected it. Then, I offered her RM 20 and she also rejected it too. She is one tough gal to negotiate with. Grrr~

Hurry up jackass!!

After waiting for 5 freaking hours, it was finally my turn. Yayyy!!! I cannot describe how happy I was at that moment. I was very nervous too, I was afraid if they would rejected my application. But fortunately they accepted it!!!! I've already could smell the money. After my application succeed I need to wait for 1-3 weeks to get the money, that long huh.. 

I'm rich!!!!!!

For my peeps, please don't expect nothing from me, because I ain't giving my money to you! After all, my favourite charity is me, and I only donate to myself!! HAHAHAHAHAHA (evil laugh)




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Death Sentence


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Let the pictures do the talk. Prepare to be afraid, really-really afraid!!!!!









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Super Popo!!


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If you're thinking that there's something wrong with your eyes when you read the title above, trust me you're doing just fine! But you guys are probably wondering what the title above got to do with me? So let me explain!!



SUPER + POPO= SUPER POPO

6.40 a.m
Woke up and performed the Subuh pray. After that I did some revision for my FIN 420 quiz.

7.40 a.m
Shower and get ready for class. 

8.00 a.m
As soon as I arrived at my faculty, I went to the office and filled in form for my PTPTN.

8.15 a.m-10.30
In class I did last minute revision for quiz and then the quiz started. Unfortunately, during the quiz I got stomachache and I could not focus for the quiz. I was hesitated to go to the toilet because I was afraid I could not finish the questions on time. 

10.30 a.m-2.30 p.m
3 classes in the row (including the quiz)

2.30 p.m
I went to my KP's (Ketua Program) office room to get the validation for my certificates.

3.00 p.m-4.00 p.m
Ate lunch and rest for a while. 

4.00 p.m-6.00 p.m
I went back to my hometown because I want to pick up my Diploma Certificate.

6.30 p.m-6.50 p.m
I went to Sungai Besar and bought foods for me and my dad.

7.00 p.m-8.30 p.m
Rest and Solah.

8.30 p.m-9.00 p.m
I went to Sungai Besar again and need to go to clinic to buy pills for my mum. She does not feel well right now.

Now, I'm sitting in front the laptop and updating this crappy blog. Now do you understand what I meant by Super Popo? No? Fuck you!! I'm fucking tired right now and need to get some sleep. Adios, and hasta la vista baby!!!!

FINISH!!




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Jealous? With me??


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Oh my, I don't know whether I need to feel angry or delightful. Here's the thing, my dear FB friend whose-name-could-not-be-mentioned told me that there's a guy envied me for being too close with her.  No, people! My friend isn't Lord Voldemort, get it? Back to the story, I feel it's funny since I've never met her in real life, we only talk and communicate via FB and phone. Furthermore, I don't have anything that other people have to be envied about, I'm not handsome, rich, smart, or charming.

Sorry to let you down people, this isn't her

I'm not angry or sad either, personally I don't give a damn, for real! It's good that other people being jealous at me, because it means I've got something that he doesn't has. In your face loser!

LOSER!!!!!

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Things that I gonna do before I'm 30!! :)


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Yes people, I'm back... I think it has been a month since I posted anything in this crappy blog. I'm no longer depress or whining about Shah Alam, thank god for that.. It really teach me to be patience, self-reliable, and learn how to share problem with others.Yeah, another thing is, on 27th January, I had my first interview, It's not for job, it's for scholarship. Long story shorts, it didn't go well so don't bother to ask for more.


Enough with this yapping, let's get back to the real thang, yeah nigga! Today I've just got this new vision to rethink what I should I do for my life. I'm not going to be here forever, sooner or later I'm going to die. But I don't want to die in misery of knowing that my life is pathetic and meaningless. Here is the list of things that I gonna in this 8 years period!


1) Finish my degree
2) Get high paying job in big company (prefer stable and well establish firm)
3) Buy car (Honda CRV FTW)
4) Get a girlfriend.
5) Have sex ( Yes, I'm a pervert)
6) Travel to Europe (France, Italy, Swiss, Belgium, UK, Austria etc)
7) Further my study and get MBA (I'm serious about this)
8) Quit my high paying job and start my own business (become Forex trader, investor)
9) Buy house
10) Buy any gadgets that I want.
11) Settle down (married)
12) Doing hajj with my parents
13) Lose weight (30-40 KG)
14) Backpacking across the globe (this time worldwide)
15) Learn how to scuba diving
16) Save enough money so I can retired before 35 ( Couple mills will do the trick)
17) Buy gun!
18) Documented every place that I go in the blog (not this one).
19) Buy a speedboat ( For fun)
20) Collecting something. I want to be a collector (stamp, pictures, gadget etc)

That's all I could think. I almost get brain-jammed for this list. It probably lame for you but I don't give a fuck. Adios, hasta la vista baby!! :)

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Kerisauan melampau!!


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Baru 3 hari masuk UiTM Shah Alam, belajar pon belum lagi tapi aku dah stress tahap gaban. Mane taknye, Ketua Program aku cakap hanya aku sorang saje pelajar baru kos finance sem ni. Masa-masa camnila aku rasa menyesal ambil cuti khas hari tu. Semua aku kena buat sendiri, kawan pon tak ada. Memang aku tengah stress!!! Tak pernah aku rasa sampai camni. Orang lain takkan paham ape yang aku rasa, aku pon tak sure kalau aku boleh abiskan semester ni. Aku hanya mampu berserah sahaja, aku percaya jika Allah mampu memberikan masalah, dia juga mampu menyelesaikan untuk aku. Aku pasti semua ni ade hikmahnya, walaupun tak pasti tapi aku yakin mesti ada sesuatu yang baik bakal menanti aku. Amin ya rabbal alamin.

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